Domestic Peace

An article I read a while ago talked about a couple living in separate apartments in the same building and why this works out for them. They met relatively late in life, they were both single with incompatible lifestyles. She has an apartment full of memorabilia and small items, she is neat, she cooks, she keeps pets, and has a deep feeling for her home. He likes simple, clean designs, large, functional items, doesn't cook, doesn't like pets, and is not particularly tidy. They waited for an opportunity to get closer, which presented itself  in the form of an apartment for sale right above hers. And since they don't want children, this arrangement is absolutely perfect for them. They prevented the petite quarrels over toothpaste, clothes on the floor and such. If you are in a similar situation and can afford it, it's absolutely genial.

Young adults living with their parents is a new trend fueled by insane housing prices. Parents of such kids are tempted to continue and educate them and this causes continuous friction. It's hard to let go and not try perfecting them "for their own sake". Here is a small tip I discovered myself and I'm sharing it with the world. I used to be mad at [expensive] clothes thrown on the floor and yell, until one day I got so mad, I decided to do something about it. I can't not care, but I can take one minute and hang the clothes on hangers. Decided and acted on. No more yelling, no friction. I told him it's really easy and preferable for me to do this and not be mad anymore. I was ready to go on with this arrangement, but after a coupe of days, he felt uneasy and started doing it himself. "Let me know if you want me to come and hang your clothes for you". "No need, I'll do it, mom". Shows that if you are serious about something, it works.

Municipal Crowdsourcing

Last week I participated in a great event planned by the Holon municipality to involve the city's residents in shaping its future. There were free refreshments (hot beverages and tasty cakes) after registration, an exhibition of the city's future plans, mingling with the mayor and other dignitaries walking around, then some speeches followed by workgroups where the residents' comments were gathered by city officials.

I was impressed by the quiet and polite atmosphere in my workgroup (Economic Growth), the civilized discussion and good ideas raised. There is a flurry of building in Holon's large industrial area. High rise office buildings are raised alongside shopping and leisure areas. We debated the types of businesses Holon should attract: hi-tech, medical centers, workshops, services (dentists, lawyers, accountants, alternative therapists)? Today 60% of the residents work in other cities, how do we lower this figure to 40%? How do we preserve and improve the city center?

Holon is a well-managed city, continuously getting prizes for its financial management, its parks and other aspects. It branded itself as the city of children and design, and has numerous cultural establishments.

The municipality reps seemed very professional and knowledgeable about their subjects. They invested a lot of thought in planning the city's future and the event. At this point you are most probably waiting for a "BUT", as everything I described sounds almost too good to be true.

At the end of the event, I congratulated one of the city officials in my workgroup for a job well done. "Our residents tell us for free what consultants would tell us for a lot of money."

Pillar of Defense Moments

I live in the center of the country, reachable only by Hamas's long range rockets. When I first heard the siren (alarm) going on, I was next to a big glass door (a big non-no when things are about to explode). I couldn't believe my ears and staid put. Next times I went into inner rooms or staircases.

One alarm caught us while walking in the park, with nowhere to hide. After the siren, we saw two Iron Dome missiles heading towards the Hamas rockets and one interception. If it wouldn't be deadly, we could have enjoyed the fireworks.

My end of the operation: a young reservist in a TV news piece talking into his mobile phone; "Mom, I'm coming home now".

Hamas is more interested in destroying our lives than bettering their own people's life claiming that Israel is the cause of their situation by its sheer existence. No solution.

Jaffa Tour Brings Back Lost Memories

Last week Dan took us on a guided tour to Jaffa. He told us many stories, showed us interesting places, one of them being the American-German colony, a tiny neighborhood I never knew existed, although I have heard about the Lutheran Emmanuel Church that hosts organ concerts.

The church brought back a long forgotten memory from 1976. Imagine Israel in 1976. Imagine Peter, then 22, coming to visit his aunt and uncle in Beer Sheba from communist Romania. There was no telephone connection and he could not tell his family when exactly he will be landing. He had no money and did not speak the language.

Next to him on the plane sat a Romanian speaking man originally from Braila.  He asked Peter whether anyone was waiting for him at the airport and found out about Peter's problem. The man's name was Baal Izidor and he was an employee of Emmanuel Church in Jaffa. He took Peter home from the airport, to 10 Hadoar street, Jaffa, where he lived with his wife and son, gave him dinner and a place to sleep. Next morning, after breakfast, he took Peter to the Central Bus Station in Tel Aviv, bought him a ticket to Beer Sheba, put him on the bus and told him to go to the watch shop in the Beer Sheba bus station, where the Romanian speaking shopkeeper (a friend of his) will further guide him to a local bus in Beer Sheba.

We could not find this man ever since to thank him for what he did. All we can do is tell this amazing story of divine providence sending a guardian angel in the form of a total stranger. 

NYC Vacation Aftermath

After several years of outdoors-style vacations, getting used to Manhattan's hustle and bustle took me some time. About 20 minutes. My jet lag wore off in a week.

Manhattan is both constant and changing (construction sites are only outnumbered by eateries), providing a different aesthetic experience every time I visit. My queen of style and aesthetics and hubby's cousin, Marion, and her family, made our stay especially enjoyable as we were able to spend quality time with them both in the city and at their lovely house in the Hamptons. Thanks to them, we stayed in a stylish Manhattan apartment, above their Tribeca business. Describing their kindness, lovingness and style is way beyond my writing talents, so I'll stop right here.

Since we already saw the city's major attractions, our program highlights this time were the High Line, the LongHouse Reserve (in East Hampton), 3 guided walking tours (highly recommended!), different markets, a Broadway musical, the NY Public Library and Bryant Park, a [too short] walk in Central Park, the South street sea port, the Frick Collection (a top aesthetic experience), and a bit of shopping. Left plenty of interesting sites for future visits. 

The most interesting part of any vacation abroad is human connection. Regular tourists usually only talk to hotel receptionists and waiters, very few talk to locals. We were lucky enough to dine with friends of our relatives and even visit one couple in their special East Hampton house. A sweet elderly lady sat next to me on a bench in Washington park and we talked. She recommended me a book I intend to order and read. Not surprisingly, she is Jewish and has relatives in Israel. Not surprisingly, because 3 million Jews live in NYC. One can live a peaceful Jewish life there at any observance level (was interesting to see a minyan in a corner of Grand Central), work less than in Israel, earn more, and not serve in the army for 3 years (with all the implied meaning). So why do Jews live in Israel and not in the USA?

One possible explanation is that Israelis are a bunch of masochists. Possible, but I think not.

If I'd be in my righteous mood, I'd say because we need to keep up (and continuously perfect) this country for any Jew who wants to come either because of persecution or antisemitism (now it's happening in France, but it can happen anywhere) or because of economical or Zionist reasons. True, but today I don't feel righteous.

There is this nationwide homeyness before and during Sabbath and holidays, even if you are secular like me. You don't feel different observing a holiday and don't have to explain to others what that is. You literally walk in the footsteps of our biblical ancestors. You get goosebumps when the guide prays in the Western Wall Tunnel at the place closest to the the Holy of Holies. All true, but not the entire story.

In Israel there is more to your life than the usual ingredients of personal happiness (family, work, friends, vacations...). Contributing to the unparalleled re-building of the Jewish homeland after 2000 years fills your life with true purpose and meaning. It's not always easy, even scary at times, but an experience unmatched by any amount of fund raising, donation or expression of solidarity (all very important). It's the real thing.

Criticizing Again

Although I promised in a previous post to leave politics to politicians and leave politics out of this blog, after much self-struggle I decided to learn about politics from the inside, and ultimately improve life in my country. As a modest beginning, I started volunteering for a new party of non-politicians, that seems trustworthy in their pursuit of a better life for the dwindling working, taxpaying, country-serving middle class. So now I am part of their local branch of volunteers, performing simple, administrative and field tasks. I enjoy being involved, although I started seeing 'signs' followed by the dilemma of whether to blog about them or not: criticizing the party in public could be counter-productive on the one hand, but an opportunity for improvement on the other.

The head of volunteering at the party's HQ came to our last branch meeting. He said what he wanted us to hear and left, without hearing what we have to say. He told us his rank in the IDF and asked about the military past of the younger men in the room (why on Earth is this related and why does this remind me of other parties?). He said that our branch is a challenge for the party because the lack of our political experience (isn't this what the party is about?) while at the end of the day this is the only thing that matters for achieving results. And the one and only result we have to achieve is X number of votes on election day. Nothing else counts. So we have to bust our asses for the 'competitive' people at HQ to land a job via the party or am I being too cynical here?

Let me tell you something, Mr. know-it-all: when you give orders in the army, the soldiers execute them, but this works 'a bit' differently with volunteers. I know from experience.

Special Wedding

Seven years ago, Tali, the daughter of our best friends, brought her boyfriend Alex to a friends' picnic. Most of us pretty much ignored the boy, thinking there will probably be other, more serious boyfriends. Besides, he didn't speak Hungarian - a major deficiency in our group. Yesterday we attended their wedding.

Special wedding is almost an oxymoron. Weddings tend to follow patterns: the rabbi trying to humor up the ceremony with witty comments, people, food, music and dancing. So what made Tali and Alex's wedding so lovely? Nice location (a kibbutz garden in the North not prohibitively far away from us), not too many people (pleasant schmoozing with old acquaintances), not too much food, in short, just the right balance of everything. At some point we even had the bride and groom sitting and eating at our table for a few precious moments.

Wishing this couple a long and happy life together, good health and prosperity.